I remember wanting to understand everything\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Why things worked that way. Why no one seemed to be in a hurry even though I\u2019d been waiting for quite a while. Why a journey that, on paper, seemed simple could turn into a little adventure. Why beauty and harshness coexisted so naturally, sometimes on the very same street, without warning and without giving me time to make sense of what I was feeling.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I arrived in India hoping to discover a fascinating country.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
And for a long time, I thought that was what I was doing: exploring cities, visiting temples, trying new flavors, learning about their customs, and observing a way of life very different from my own.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
It wasn't until I realized that India wasn't just showing me a country.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Also I was showing myself.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n My impatience.<\/p>\n\n\n\n My need to understand.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The way I reacted when things didn't go as I had planned.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Everything I admired. Everything that made me uncomfortable. What I judged too quickly. What moved me without my really knowing why.<\/p>\n\n\n\n That's why I say that India could become a model<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Not because it has any magical power. Nor because every situation we experience there holds a lesson meant especially for us. India isn't waiting for us to arrive to transform us.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n It is a real country\u2014vast, diverse, contradictory, and complex. Its people are not merely part of the backdrop to our inner journey, and their struggles are not lessons placed in our path.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The mirror appears somewhere else.<\/p>\n\n\n\n It appears in the way India awakens something within us.<\/p>\n\n\n\n At home, we know how almost everything works.<\/p>\n\n\n\n We know the codes, the schedules, and the unwritten rules. We know how long it will take us to get somewhere, how to ask for what we need, and what is expected of us in most situations.<\/p>\n\n\n\n We navigate a familiar reality. Even when we're tired or living life at too fast a pace, we have routines that allow us to maintain a certain sense of control.<\/p>\n\n\n\n In India, many of those references disappear.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The noise can be overwhelming. The traffic seems to defy all known logic. Plans change. Distances seem to stretch on forever. Someone tells you it\u2019ll be ten minutes, and you still don\u2019t know if that means ten minutes, half an hour, or simply, \u00abWe\u2019ll get there when we get there.\u00bb.<\/p>\n\n\n\n At first, you try to stay in control. You check your watch. You review the itinerary. You ask questions. You seek explanations. You constantly compare what\u2019s happening with what you think should be happening.<\/p>\n\n\n\n And India continues at its own pace.<\/p>\n\n\n\n That can be frustrating.<\/p>\n\n\n\n I know this because I, too, have felt tired, irritable, and wished that everything were a little simpler. I\u2019ve wanted to understand situations I didn\u2019t understand. I\u2019ve judged things before knowing the context. I\u2019ve felt like certain moments were too much for me to handle.<\/p>\n\n\n\n India hasn't always been easy for me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n I have loved her and rejected her, sometimes even on the same day.<\/p>\n\n\n\n But over time, I began to notice something: What upset me wasn't always just about India<\/strong>. It was about me, too.<\/p>\n\n\n\n How hard it was for me not to know.<\/p>\n\n\n\n On My Relationship with Waiting.<\/p>\n\n\n\n On the need to anticipate what was going to happen.<\/p>\n\n\n\n My peace of mind depended so much on reality living up to my plans.<\/p>\n\n\n\n That's where the mirror began.<\/p>\n\n\n\n To say that India is a mirror does not mean that we have to approve of everything that happens there.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Some situations are uncomfortable because they truly are. There is poverty, inequality, discrimination, and realities that should not be romanticized. There are times when it\u2019s necessary to set boundaries, walk away, or say no.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Looking at yourself doesn't mean justifying everything.<\/p>\n\n\n\n This means that, After acknowledging what is before us, we can also observe what is happening within us.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Sometimes, the things that irritate us the most touch on a part of ourselves that we don't usually look at.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Waiting brings our impatience to the forefront.<\/p>\n\n\n\n An unexpected change reveals just how much we need to control everything.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Not understanding what is happening forces us to confront our difficulty with dealing with uncertainty.<\/p>\n\n\n\n A different cultural reality reveals just how quickly we make our way of life the standard by which all others are measured.<\/p>\n\n\n\n When we're traveling, we're more tired, more vulnerable, and far removed from the routines that normally sustain us. That's why our reactions come through so clearly.<\/p>\n\n\n\n It's not as if India created them. They were already there.<\/p>\n\n\n\n India has simply taken away, for a moment, everything that helped us not to see them<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The mirror isn't just reflected in what irritates us.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n It's also in the things that move us.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n I've always been moved by the way spirituality is woven into everyday life in India.<\/p>\n\n\n\n I\u2019m not just talking about the great temples or the ceremonies on the banks of the Ganges. I\u2019m talking about small gestures. Like seeing someone light a stick of incense before raising the shutters of their shop. Or a flower carefully placed before an image. Or hands that pause for a few seconds to greet, give thanks, or ask for protection before starting the day.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Life doesn't stop so we can practice spirituality. Spirituality is part of life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n I've also been touched by many unexpected conversations, by people's curiosity and hospitality, and by how easily someone might offer you a chai and make room for you beside them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n For a long time, I thought I simply admired those scenes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Later, I realized that, in a way, they were also telling me something I needed to hear.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Take a longer break.<\/p>\n\n\n\n A stronger presence.<\/p>\n\n\n\n More ritual.<\/p>\n\n\n\n A less hurried way of being in the world.<\/p>\n\n\n\n What we admire on the outside can reveal something we miss on the inside.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Not necessarily to copy it or to apply it to our lives exactly as we\u2019ve seen it. India is not a homogeneous philosophy that we can pack up and take home in a suitcase.<\/p>\n\n\n\n But some experiences can indeed help us remember something we had forgotten.<\/p>\n\n\n\n This is one of the most common phrases you hear when people talk about India:<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u00abIndia Transforms You\u00bb or \u00abIndia Changes Your Life\u00bb<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n For years, I've tried to explain how I felt when I returned. And I understand why we use that phrase. Some trips affect us so deeply that it's hard to find other words.<\/p>\n\n\n\n But today I wouldn't say that India automatically transforms you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n It's not enough to get on a plane, visit an ashram, watch a ceremony, or walk the streets of Varanasi to become a different person.<\/p>\n\n\n\n You can travel through India and come back with the same sense of urgency, the same prejudices, and the same need to have everything under control.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Because India doesn't do the work for you.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n What you can do is shake off<\/strong>. Throw you off balance<\/strong>. To unsettle you enough that something that had remained hidden becomes visible.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n It can open a crack in your usual way of seeing things and leave you facing a question that\u2019s no longer so easy to ignore.<\/p>\n\n\n\n What does all this I'm feeling say about me?<\/p>\n\n\n\n That is where its strength lies.<\/p>\n\n\n\n India isn't here to tell you who you should be. It can show you who you are when things don't go as you expected.<\/p>\n\n\n\n After that, what you do with it is up to you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n If you're expecting me to say that India suddenly transformed me, I'll tell you that it didn't.<\/p>\n\n\n\n There was no big revelation.<\/p>\n\n\n\n I didn't come back one day as a different person.<\/p>\n\n\n\n It was something much more subtle.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Like those drops of water that, without making a sound, eventually shape a rock.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Over time, I began to notice small changes. More patience in the face of the unexpected. A little less resistance when I couldn\u2019t control a situation. The ability to observe before reacting. A different relationship with silence, breathing, and daily rituals.<\/p>\n\n\n\n I don't always manage to do it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n I keep losing my patience. I keep wanting to be in control. I keep resisting certain situations.<\/p>\n\n\n\n But now I can admit it. And that, too, is part of the mirror.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Transformation is not about achieving a perfect, serene, and spiritual version of oneself <\/strong>about ourselves. It involves looking at ourselves more honestly and learning to relate differently to what we encounter.<\/p>\n\n\n\n When you return from India, you get back into your regular schedule, your responsibilities, and your daily life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Everything seems to be falling back into place.<\/p>\n\n\n\n However, some questions come back to you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n What bothered me the most?<\/p>\n\n\n\n Why did that scene move me so much?<\/p>\n\n\n\n What did I judge without trying to understand?<\/p>\n\n\n\n What did I discover about the way I react?<\/p>\n\n\n\n What part of my experiences do I want to hold on to?<\/p>\n\n\n\n The trip may end at the airport. The mirror<\/a>, no.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Sometimes it lingers for years, surfacing at unexpected moments\u2014while you\u2019re waiting, when plans change, during a conversation, or when you need to pause in the middle of a busy day.<\/p>\n\n\n\nIndia takes you out of your usual way of life<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
What bothers you also says something about you<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
We are also what we admire<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
So, does traveling to India change you?<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
Major changes don't always make a splash<\/h2>\n\n\n\n
The real journey begins when you return<\/h2>\n\n\n\n